MANHOOD, AN UNATTAINABLE CONCEPT worth pursuing, a symbol that represents a set of values and virtues that every man should fully embody or at least do his best to integrate into his life.

Even though much dirt has been thrown at masculinity, even though its definitions have been obscured to fit selfish goals and ideological agendas, the ideals of manhood can serve as a great compass in a man’s life, and understanding the real virtues that manhood represents is a key element to not fall prey to the charlatans who fake its meaning.

The elements that represent true and mature manhood always were and still are a blessing in our rough and merciless world.

When talking about sacrifice, many talk about giving little with the hope of gaining much. Let us not forget, friend, the man (Rodney Clark) who sacrificed his own life, shielding his wife during a tornado in a final act of love that saved her life. There is no greater act of love than being willing to give your life for something that you believe in.

For such men, there are no empty words, and sacrifice of one’s life, viewed through the lens of manhood, represents a strong conviction in a man’s beliefs and in his family. It is a statement within his value system that underlines the importance of love, honor, and keeping your word.

Admire, friend, men that are willing to give their lives for honorable beliefs, for their families, and for their communities.

Self-sufficiency is another trait built in masculinity. Keep in mind that there are no honorable tales that glorify a man who is not self-sufficient. When the going gets tough, a mature man doesn’t talk his way out of the situation. Instead, he gets going.

As a man, you have no right to choose not to engage with the situations that life throws at you because that would imply that someone else would have to take care of you. The world doesn’t owe you a living, you will have to earn that right.

Respect the men that are self-sufficient and learn from them how to take care of yourself and your needs.

The right to choose comes from choosing, for example, to take a job that pays enough to have more choices when you are away from that job. Many times choices come with a risk. To invest in stocks and business requires risk. To dedicate years of your life studying to become a doctor or an engineer, taking part-time jobs just to get by requires risk.

Appreciate the men that are not afraid to risk a lot and learn, friend, how to be willing to fail constantly with the hope of being rewarded one day with more choices, so that you will be able to provide a security for your wife and children that you never had for yourself.

The process of learning to take risks has the potential to teach you what is and what is not efficient. Learn from such an experience how to fine-tune the questions that you must ask in your field of action and learn from the men that are already doing it. Complaining about problems is useless if you do not take action.

To become effective you need to learn to make a distinction between two types of complaining: “I am helpless” versus “This is the problem, now here is the solution”. Look up to men who are not tolerant to the ones complaining about how they can’t do something because this kind of intolerance exerts a pressure on a man to find a solution for the problem that created the complaint.

Do your best, friend, to always act and tackle the challenges that you are facing, even if this means that you need to fail a lot until you find a solution.v

Doing may be better than complaining but doing is sometimes not enough. A man’s pressure to earn as much as he can with his skills, to provide a great life for himself and the ones he loves, means constantly pushing the limits of each and every talent that he has.

Show recognition and learn from the successful men that understand that pushing the limits also means balancing the politics of everyone else’s egos while making themselves succeed, balancing façade with personal integrity, and selling their skills repeatedly without appearing as if they are selling.

Appreciate the men that see boundaries as opportunities instead of limitations, the men that push themselves beyond their limits, the selfless men that pull along anyone who wants to do the same.

In all the seriousness of life having the ability to laugh at yourself and at the situations that you encounter may be one of the best things that can emerge from the pursuit of becoming a mature man. Look up to men, rough men, ambitious men, loving men that are seeing life as a game, an idea that gives them the ability to laugh both at their own roles in it as well as life itself.

Remember, friend, that humor can throw some clear light in so many difficult moments, showing how small the small things are, making the challenges of life easier to bear. Applaud the men that have the ability to laugh and mock each other, the men able to have a good laugh even in the most dire situations, the men who refuse to give up their smiles even when facing the biggest tragedies of their lives.

On your journey of becoming a mature man, keep in mind friend, to absorb these points with the utmost humility. There is no such thing as an “expert” in manhood. Learn to refine your viewpoints as you gain more knowledge and use these principles and ideas as a guide to build the best possible life for yourself and the ones around you.

Manhood is a choice. Opposition and adversity is what you want and must have to be good at anything and hardship is the fertile soil of manhood and self-reliance. Make the choice to live the honorable code of manhood.

Choose the hard way.

If you missed the first part of this series, you can explore it here: True Virtues Of Manhood (1)